And I will whisper…
“Sure.”
Author Archive for Captain Jim
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All it took was one bad day…
One bad day to drive him over the edge…
And he realized the truth of the world.
Continue reading ‘If I weren’t insane, I couldn’t be so brilliant!’
…surely you’ve seen the resemblance between Sonic and Dragon Ball Z.
The seven collectible items of great power…
The pointy, glowing yellow hair as you go into an “SS” mode…
Ugly people wanting you dead…
But it’s EXTREEEME.
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!
Continue reading ‘HaaaaaaAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH! MY POWER IS GREATER THAN YOURS YOU WILL FAIL.’
Created to destroy that which he was based off of…
A machine…with a need for speed…
Dr. Ivo “Eggman” Robotnik, the unsurpassed mechanical genius, created this…imposter to take down that blasted Sonic once and for all!
METAL SONIC!
Hudson.
It’s more than “that company with the bee that makes the Mario Party games.”
Oh, no. They’re much more than that.
They made games on the TURBOGRAFX created beautiful masterpieces of games. Today, the heroes of two of their wonderful franchises join the Brawl.
One is a pudgy lad, trying to save his love by battling through island obstacles.
The other likes to blow things up.
A little bird bee told me that you’d like to see the pics. Well, here they are. Continue reading ‘Two Hudson Heroes Join The Brawl!’
We regret to inform all of you that a newer member of our team, Spire, has left us. He is giving up Textures for his painting career. The best of luck to you, Spire.
Gather around, youngsters, and lemme tell ya a story.
Y’see, Pikachu’s been in every Smash Bros. game, right? Well, yer wrong! A Pikachu has been in ever single one of them Smash games, but it’s not the same one! Betcha didn’t know that, huh?
The Brawl Pikachu is the young’un, and the son of the Pikachu in Melee.
The Pikachu in Melee is the son of the Pikachu in Smash Bros. on the 64.
The 64 Pikachu is widely considered ta be the stongest of the Pikachu, most likely due to level grindin’ from the Red an’ Blue games. He taught his son, and later his grandson, how to be excellent Smashers. Today, the 64 Pika, now known as Pappychu, is paying this new-fangled Brawl a visit! YAY! GRANDPA’S COMING!
Actually, it’s….
Time….
For….
ANIMANIACS!
And we’re zany to the max
So just sit back and relax
You’ll laugh ’til you collapse
We’re Animaniacs!
Come join the Warner Brothers
And the Warner Sister, Dot
Just for fun we run around the Warner movie lot.
They lock us in the tower whenever we get caught
But we break loose and then vamoose
And now you know the plot!
We’re Animaniacs!
Dot is cute and Yakko yaks.
Wakko packs away the snacks
While Bill Clinton plays the sax.
We’re Animaniacs!
Meet Pinky and the Brain who want to rule the universe.
Goodfeathers flock together; Slappy whacks ’em with her purse.
Buttons chases Mindy, while Rita sings a verse.
The writers flipped; we have no script
Why bother to rehearse?
We’re Animaniacs!
We have pay-or-play contracts.
We’re zany to the max
There’s baloney in our slacks.
We’re Animanie,
Totally insaney
PZT’s awfully complainy
ANIMANIACS!
And those are the facts!
Bushido. The samurai code of honor. For ages, the great Japanese warriors followed this code.
Unfortunately, in the future, this sense of honor is nowhere to be found in certain samurai…
Certain samurai like the one who drives number Five in the F-ZERO grand prix. He’s never passed up an opportunity to participate in an F-ZERO race (means he’s never passed up an opportunity to get beaten by Captain Falcon too).
But it’ll be different this year. He can’t lose in his Fire Stingray! So please welcome the Japanese Wario—
SAMURAAAAAAAAAI GORROOOOOOOH!
(Boooooo)
HRRRRUGH?!
Continue reading ‘You stole the update from us last time! You will PAY for that!’
Bet ya’ll are excited for more Tatsunoko, huh?
Joji Meta-Knightmi is just an average, normal Kirby-thing. However, modern science can turn him into a mighty space warrior – Tekkaman. This becomes a reality when aggressive aliens come from space to invade Dreamland. Armed with a space lance, Tekkaman gallantly goes into action against the grotesque space creatures! Continue reading ‘Pegas! Tek-Setter!’
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